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Saturday, September 12 2015

Dear Friends…

Rejection. Nobody likes it, but everyone will and does experience it. No matter how great your relationships may be, at some point on the road of relationships you will get your feelings hurt, feel left out, not considered or flat out abandoned by someone you care about. It’s hard to take, and often leaves us with a resolve to protect our heart in attempts to not get hurt like that again. But is this the right solution? Think about it. This would mean never getting close to another and that leads us to isolation.

So what do we do when we experience rejection? While we have no control over how others treat us, we do have control over how we handle things or react when we get hurt.

Here are the three typical psychological responses a person might have: 
1. Fight: You react; you engage or attack the other person not worried about the outcome. (“I hate you. You never pay attention to me.”) 
2. Flight: You “run” or escape internally in order to protect yourself. (“If you don’t care, I just won’t talk to you.”)
3. Freeze: You act like nothing is wrong and keep your emotions to yourself. The rejection is kept inside which shuts down your emotions. (“Nothing’s wrong. I’m okay”.)

Or there is a fourth option: 
4. Focus: We can remember the truths of God and choose to focus on those truths instead of the initial feeling of rejection. Remember: whatever you magnify becomes the biggest influence in your life. Don’t allow others to define your truth and tell you who you are. Use God’s word to rewire your brain.

God’s truth says this…

He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces he was despised, and we held him in low esteem.” Isaiah 53:3 (He knows how you feel!)

He will never leave you or forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5 (Our earthly relationships will always fall short, but not so with God.)

This is my comfort and consolation in my affliction: that Your word has revived me and given me life”. Psalm 119:50 (God’s reviving comfort is available when experience rejection.)

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.” Ephesians 2:10 (You are chosen and loved by Him.)

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:14 (God created you for a purpose. It is perfect and good.)

So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.” Matthew 10:31 (God loves you, you are valuable to Him and you are worthy of love.)

"So don't be afraid, little flock. For it gives your Father great happiness to give you the Kingdom”. Luke12: 32 (God has good gifts to give you even when others do not. You are never alone.)

Next time you experience rejection, turn to God and pour your pain out to Him. Allow His truths to soothe your heart and heal your wounds. Practice remembering His truths and watch your feelings be transformed!

Blessings~ Angel

Posted by: Angel H Davis AT 02:31 pm   |  Permalink   |  Email

Benefits of Weariness

 

WOW! How weary I am. And so are many of you. I know because I hear your cries: in my office, on the phone, online, in church, at the grocery store, you name it! So much of what I hear from people today is about how tired, weary, and worn-out they feel.

Then again, you may not feel weary;  instead you may feel anxious, depressed, scared, lonely, angry, or any mixture of these emotions. Perhaps these are more your prominent feelings.

 

However you may feel, it’s too easy to look for the source or to find blame: social media; busy schedules; technology; work/family demands; the causes are endless. Of course, these have validity, and we can certainly manage them in more appropriate and successful ways.

 

Yet, as I sit with God today, in my quiet time, and look over my journals, what I see is the benefit of weariness—the benefit of our broken feelings and situations.

 I see, time and time again, over the years (yes, I am rebellious and slow-learning, and God is very, very patient), God working in me and through me, enabling me to receive His antidote to this tough life and all of its problems. 

 

It is so simple; and yet it is so hard.

 

It is HIM: Jesus; always more of Him.

 

“But,” you say, “Angel, I have to know what to do with my children,” or, “Angel, these bills are piling up,” or, “Angel, you don’t have a CLUE of how bad it really is.”

 

And I will say, “You are right, I don’t. And you are correct, these things need to be taken care of.” 

 

BUT FIRST, we have a larger need. Oh, the catch is it doesn’t appear like the larger need. Our core need, before bills, children, purpose in life, change in our feelings, is to be convinced, truly convinced and accepting of God’s love for us and our identity as His children.

 

And your heart and head may rebel like mine did.

 

“BUT, I need to know the answer to my problem.” 

And Jesus says:

“I am the answer.”

“I am so tired.”

And Jesus says:

“I know. Let me restore you.”

“I am afraid.”

And Jesus says:

“I know, and my love will take care of that.”

 

That just doesn’t seem like much; doesn’t seem like enough, when we are about to be evicted or our kids are in harm’s way. That support just doesn’t seem practical enough for our human brains to rest on.

 

Perhaps then we’ve hit on the real source or problem of our weariness: ourselves. You and me believing that if we work hard enough, try enough, worry enough, take enough time to figure it out, talk enough to that person, ignore it long enough—whatever your “enough” is—WE can fix it. The true problem is that it’s all about US!

 

We want to stay in the driver’s seat and be our own savior. Or we look to other humans to be that for us. If we believe our answer lies in us or other humans, we are likely to stay in that “out of control” anxious space, and the weariness or depression or addictions are bound to take over. There can only be one driver in our car of life.

 

The benefit of our struggle is to be wooed into the true solution. Life’s struggles are an invitation to know God more intimately. As we allow Jesus, who is ALIVE, who is the same yesterday, today, and forever, to become more real for us, more tangible, as we take Him at His word (Hebrews 13:5), as we choose to focus on Him and His promises, instead of the problems or feelings we are having, then we start to experience the reality of His presence with us.  With this, we begin to experience the peace He promises.


Why? Because our problems have been solved? The bills have all been paid? The feelings change?


NO…  peace comes from HIS presence. And in that place of peace we can see clearer, hear more accurately, and receive wisdom and direction.

 

As we “bend our knee” to Jesus’ love, dare to take Him at His word (John 3:16), choose to look to Him and depend on Him, and keep (John 17) depending on Him, then His life-blood starts to flow through us. It revives us, directs us, and transforms our thinking and feelings. Then life and all of its troubles, which are many (John 16:33), become manageable, doable.

 

Breath comes; rest comes; peace comes.

 

In this place new life springs forth. New ideas emerge and joy is eventually restored.

 

Struggling today? Rejoice in it, because it is calling you back home. Home to His heart of love (Romans 8:38-39), the place of true peace and rest. 

1020 Barber Creek Drive, Suite 203, Watkinsville, GA 30677  ///  706.543.7012  ///  info@angelhdavis.com

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